Bee-reavment

As I have been kashering my apartment for Passover, the building has been hitting high heats, combined with the fact that it is is the 90s outside and I am burning the stovetops after using industrial oven cleaner, so I have all of the windows open as well as the front door and the air conditioner running full blast.

About a half hour ago I saw a bee flying around my dining room table. As someone who doesn't react well to bee-stings, I decided I can't just have him flying around my apartment, but I also didn't want to hurt him (unlike mosquitos whose sole existences is to suck my blood and spread disease which I will dispatch without regret, and sometimes on Shabbat; for though it is forbidden to kill on Shabbat, because mosquitos may carry a host of deadly diseases, including West Nileand therefore Pikuach Nefesh kicks in), but the bee doesn't actually want to hurt me. So I turned off the lights, ended up crashing my leg into the coffee table which I had turned around in order to clean and so my leg started bleeding.

Anyway, I tried to direct the bee outside, spraying some scented air fresheners as bees rely heavily on their sense of smell (or so is my understanding). But instead he went into my window screen. I shut the window trying to figure out what to do with him. I got a long umbrella and tried to remove my window screen or use it to direct him to the two gaping holes that were in the window screen before I moved in. He was just running around frantically. I tried to dustbuster him and then planned on reversing it when I got outside, but he ran away from it. I accidentially crushed him with the umbrella tip after about 15 minutes, he was mortally injured at this point, so I put him out of his misery, feeling horrible about it, though needing to uphold the mitzvah against Tzar Baaleh Chayim, that you shouldn't subject animals to pain.

This is part of a trend of ways I have been feeling about living creatures as of late. I have been seriously considering vegetarianism recently. Some, such as my downstairs neighbor, may scoff at my suggestion (though he has recently dropped a ranking in the food chain, himself). I was somewhat affected by the class we did on Shechita as well as seeing a rooster sacrificed for Kapparot with my cousins before Yom Kippur.

I, in fact, have been having feelings regarding the wastefulness of our culture, how we waste food, electricity, water, fill the landfills, it's totally ridiculous. I am totally guilty of all of these things. As someone who, due to my job, goes to bar mitzvah and wedding parties beyond number I notice the sheer wastefulness of people, beyond money.

I think the way we slaughter animals is the most humane way to do it. After seeing "No Country for Old Men" I think the captive bolt pistol is just barbaric. At least in Kashrut we need to show respect for the animals (or ideally we should)

I don't know what I'm going to do regarding this. I do enjoy eating meat and don't see myself as a vegetarian. But I'm thinking of cutting back. I don't know. Time will tell. Besides, this is a poor time of the year to give up meat. What can a vegetarian eat during pesach because soy, beans, rice, seeds, and corn are all forbidden. I can't just eat flax seed for an entire week (for some reason flax is okay...)

Anyway, that's just another rant. Delayed Dvar Torah on Metzora soon... possibly...

Sound the foghorn!

If you live in the LA area, particularly the San Fernando Valley or Bel Air, you might have noticed the spooky fog we've had today. The Valley basin was covered with it this morning, I saw from my Bel Air vista. Around 5:15 PM the fog started coming in to Bel Air itself and has persisted ever since. It is a very strange fog, almost London-like. I don't remember seeing much evening fog in LA county in my 20 years I have spent in LA. Perhaps there is therefore symbolism in this fog

After all of these wildfires we finally get some beneficial weather. But perhaps there is another symbol being represented here. This fog, filled with precipitation, comes the very same day that the Dodgers picked up Joe Torre to be their manager. I'm sure you can come
"up with something about that, but I'm to tired to make the connection. I am both excited and slightly weirded out. Excited because... he's Joe Torre! Slightly weirded out because... he's Joe Torre! The former Yankees skipper is now a Dodger‽ I think that the Dodgers are quickly turning into the All-Century team but with the players past their prime. At the same time, I tzAhink Joe Torre has a great chance to turn around a ball club that is used to having great win streaks followed by even greater lose streak. And If we get A-Rod, our menagerie of future hall-of-famers will be complete. I'm not complaining, I'm excited to have such an interesting collection of players on one team, my team. What would Nomar and A-Rod talk about, formerly on the Red Sox and Yankees respectively)? Would Joe Torre hold anything against Nomar who, though was off the Red Sox earlier in the year when the Curse of the Bambino was broken, represents the Bane of his existence? Maybe I'm reading much too into this. This is going to be a fun season...

Rooster's Revenge

Alright, so now for the trauma, as I have promised. Disclaimer that this is not for the faint of heart. You have been warned.

Today I have performed a number of acts that should pretty much secure me in the Book of Life Category. I properly fasted the Fast of Gedaliah, not even experiencing hunger or thirst at its conclusion. I recited the selichot of aforementioned fast as well as that of the Ten Days of Repentence. I ascended Mount Sinai (the cemetery, not the mountain) to visit the graves of my grandparents, aleyhem ha'shalom, braving the two mile freeway backup (no joke) to get into the cemetery today (I guess people are dying to get in... (joke)) . I went to Lake Balboa and performed Tashlich, throwing my sins in the form of breadcrumbs into the living, albeit man-made waters. I had a chicken swung around my head.

Wait, what was that last one?!

I newly have Persian in-laws and it is considered a method of great mazel to the family to perform the ancient ritual of Kapparot, or as we Yiddishists prefer to refer to it, shluggin kapporus. This is probably the closest thing in modern Judaism to the Holy Temple, quite literally a sacrifice. This is also why I am mildly traumatized. I have never performed the ritual, at least never with a living creature, but always with money that I would then donate to charity. But I decided to tag along and so we went to Ohel Moshe in Pico-Robertson this morning and the Rabbi there elevated a rooster by under its wings (so as to not hurt it) over our heads, reciting a formula to transfer our sins onto the rooster. Something like "Though this rooster goes to its death may these people live long lives free of sin". Following this the guy turns aside, massages the neck of the bird, lulling it into a restful state, and takes a special rectangular knife and severed the juggular vein. This is also the first time I have ever experienced shechita. A messy business but that is the only way to have kosher food. The birds will be given, by the way, to poor families as food, thus killing two birds with one stone (pardon the pun), not only somehow ridding us of our sins, but as tzedekah so poor people can have a proper feast on the eve of Yom Kippur.

I must say, as traumatized as this will probably make me, It is also incredibly humbling. This rooster was put to death so that we could somehow be cleansed of our sins. Kinda makes you want to avoid sin at all costs. I finally have an appreciation for the Hebrew term "Yirat Chet" "Fear of Sin". Short of going to a mikvah (something I have yet to do in my life) and being sprinkled by the ashes of the red heifer (something anyone is yet to do in their life in the past 2000 years), I am squeaky clean as I can get. Still, the rooster may get his revenge in my psyche, a la Aornis Hades in the Thursday Next series. I'm not soon going to forget it...

All the same, I think I'll stick to tzedekah next year.

Chased by ducks

Nope, the title is not creative in any sense. Today I was chased by a flush of ducks ("flush" being a collective noun for the species). I don't know which species, but they were all black, with white bills, red eyes, yellow and black legs, and huge webbed blue-green feet. They look sort of similar to Black Scoters, but I'm not quite sure. Anyway on my 11.3 mile jog/powerwalk today (map shown below), I went around a number of ponds and lakes. At Lake Encino, as I was making a sharp turn on the pedestrian path. Suddenly a duck leaves the water and jumps up the 8 inches of concrete to right behind me. This reverse-Nachshon was followed by a couple hundred ducks. These things chased me maybe 1,000 feet. Then they found something more interesting to stalk. That's when I reached the largest goose (I'm not sure it was a goose, it may have been a roc) I have ever seen. Now this gi-normous white bird this started sizing me up, walking around me. It started quacking and soon I started walking away (I wanted to keep at least some pace to my jog) and sure enough the huge bird followed me into the parking lot.

It was a great jog today, as you can see on my mapmyrun jog. I am not so sure about the calories burned stuff, but I had one hell of a workout.



Ciao!

Thoreau had the right idea

I should never discount the therapeutic and logorrheic value of a park. I got immense amounts of work done on my Rabbinical School essays at Holmby Park. I took my dog on a walk (though he'd like to think that he's taking me on the walk). After a while I sat on a bench, extended his leash, and took out about 18 pages out of my pocket. As Tuggy tried to chase squirrels up a tree, I made a lot of progress.

Good Shabbos.