ARTICLE: Temple weeds out 'Tree of Life'

Sorry, couldn't resist the cover story from Tuesday's Los Angeles Daily News, something that so ties into the class I took at Columbia with Professor Jonathan Schorsch, Religious Halucinography. Additionally, this article is the subject of the top video of the day on the same website, I don't know how long the link will exist (it's streaming), but check it out for now here

Temple weeds out 'Tree of Life'

Congregation of Christians, Jews uses marijuana for religious 'sacrament'

BY BRAD A. GREENBERG, Staff Writer LA Daily News

Article Last Updated:02/26/2007 11:50:07 PM PST

HOLLYWOOD - The Rev. Craig X Rubin read aloud a passage from 1 Kings as the sun set and his congregation prepared for the Sabbath. Flicking a lighter to the lone candle atop the podium, Rubin burned a bud of marijuana on the flame. He puffed it out, walked to each of the eight members sitting in the pews and waved the smoldering cannabis around them. This, Rubin proclaims, carries the prayers of Temple 420 to God. That's the God of Isaac and of Jesus, because members are Christians and Jews. That makes the congregation Rubin founded last summer unique. But what really sets it apart - and the reason Rubin will be in court Friday - is the temple's use of marijuana as a religious sacrament. "I am willing to preach the Bible and go to jail if it means getting my message out there," the 41-year-old Panorama City man said. And he knows how strange that sounds. "I'm a Jewish kid from Beverly Hills who went to UCLA. I could have been a lawyer making $250 an hour like the rest of my friends, or a TV producer. Instead, I'm teaching the Bible, selling weed on Hollywood Boulevard, facing seven years in jail - of course I'm crazy." The temple's problems actually began as a poisoning investigation performed by homicide detectives. One day last fall, a delivery driver and a security guard were given baked goods from Temple 420, said police spokesman Kevin Maiberger. Both became violently ill and almost died. No charges came of that, but a few weeks later, on Nov. 3, an undercover officer joined Temple 420. Five days later, at 4:20 p.m., police raided it. The temple's assets were seized, as were Rubin's. He, his 18-year-old son and another man were charged with one count each of selling or transporting marijuana and one count of possessing marijuana for sale. "They were trying to set it up under the guise of a religious right and then be able to sidestep marijuana laws," Maiberger said. "The deal was for a $100 initiation fee and $100 annual fee, you could buy all the pot you wanted for quote-unquote `religious purpose.' That's bull----." Rubin, however, continues to distribute marijuana six days a week to the temple's members - there are more than 400 who have paid the initiation and annual dues - for a "requested donation" of $60 for an eighth of an ounce. He continues to burn marijuana as a sacrament at Friday night services and preaches on the weekends - Old Testament on Saturdays, New Testament on Sundays, always at 4:20. His defense relies on his insistence that God wants people to enjoy cannabis - for recreation, religion and industry - and his belief that federal and state laws protect his religious practices. "It's not a laughable argument," said Eugene Volokh, a UCLA School of Law professor and religious freedom expert. "It's just an uphill argument." Temple 420 would need to demonstrate that its beliefs are sincere and that marijuana use is not the foundation of the religion but part of a broader ethical system, Volokh said. Also, the organization would need to prove that its practices don't come at the expense of a compelling government interest. "But it's not open and shut," Volokh said. In 1996, the 9th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals ruled that Rastafarians, who believe marijuana is a sacrament, could use federal law to defend their use of the drug, but not to defend distribution or possession with the intent to distribute. Last year, the U.S. Supreme Court ruled unanimously that a small religious group in New Mexico could use a hallucinogenic drug in its services. Groups often opposed to each other - from the American Civil Liberties Union to the National Association of Evangelicals - had supported O Centro Espirita Beneficente Uniao do Vegetal in its defense against the government. But the federal Religious Freedom Restoration Act of 1993, cited in the Rasta and O Centro cases, doesn't apply at the state level, and that's where the charges against Rubin will be heard. California has not passed a law similar to the federal one, and the state Supreme Court has not clearly defined whether the state constitution provides greater religious protection than the First Amendment. And, of course, there are plenty of Temple 420 skeptics. "I would inherently be suspect ... of someone attempting to use the Bible as a justification of their desire to smoke marijuana," said Brad Dacus, founder and president of the Pacific Justice Institute, a legal defender of Christian values. "It's not unusual for people to try to use religion as a pretext for purposes of carrying out their pleasures." Temple 420's tenets stem from Rubin's Jewish childhood, conversion to Christianity and experience taking peyote in American-Indian sweat lodges. A pro-pot Republican partial to dark suits and red ties, Rubin hangs the American flag behind his podium and gushes about Ronald Reagan. He has been a marijuana activist since his days at UCLA in the early '90s. A "roper" - who believes hemp is a medicinal marvel and a panacea for fiber, food and fuel shortages - and a "doper," Rubin was dubbed "Hollywood's Wizard of Weed" by High Times magazine and was a consultant on Showtime's hit "Weeds" for two seasons. While undergoing a family crisis three years ago, Rubin began studying the Bible and, he claims, God revealed to him cannabis' status as the tree of life. Last year, after the Supreme Court ruled on O Centro, Rubin reasoned he could openly practice his new beliefs, which he describes as "Judeo-Christian" and "Bible based." In August, Scott Linden, a Pasadena attorney who has helped open several medical-marijuana dispensaries in the San Fernando Valley, filed paperwork with the Secretary of State's Office that registered Temple 420 as a religious corporation. The organization, however, did not file for tax-exempt status, said Franchise Tax Board spokesman Patrick Hill. Religious services began Aug. 26, and Craig Roberts, who added the X to his name after studying Malcolm X and changed his last name back to that of his Jewish grandfather, started going by "reverend." Rubin did not attended a seminary but was ordained in 1990 by the Universal Life Church, an interfaith organization that offers "Free Instant Online Ordination." "Using sacrament as a way to elevate my spirituality blew me out," said temple member Evan Goding, 29, of Orange, who drives to Hollywood each week with his Jewish girlfriend. "I was like, no way. It just clicked. It made so much sense. "I've always believed that the world as a whole would be better if most people would just try marijuana. It brings out the better in people. And I'm sorry it's not legal; I'm sorry I can't use it for my religious beliefs without being persecuted." Temple 420 is located in a strip mall at the corner of Hollywood Boulevard and La Brea Avenue, next door to an H&R Block and across the street from a Christian Science Church. Fifteen to 30 people stop by most days to pick up pot, said the cashier, who wouldn't give his name. Rubin gets his stash from the same guys who sell it to medical-marijuana dispensaries, but he charges about 20 percent less per eighth of an ounce. Income goes to pay salaries and support the temple, he said. He insists he turns away about half the people who try to join; new members must sign an agreement professing, among other things, that "the God of the Bible created cannabis ... for the healing of all nations." "There are six medical-marijuana clubs within walking distance of here," Rubin said. "If you're a liar, you don't need to come here. Pretend you are sick." But it is clear some of Temple 420's members aren't interested in the religious services. The sanctuary seats about 40. Some members have never attended. "For me, it was worth it," David Donahue, 37, of West Hollywood said of joining the temple. "If I didn't get it through him, I would get it through one of my friends' dealers - and I don't know anyone here. "Two hundred bucks, to some people, it's a lot. It's a lot to me, don't get me wrong. But we pay for convenience." brad.greenberg@dailynews.com (818) 713-3634

Naked golden men carrying swords

By now you've probably considered my use of inverted euphamisms and the fact that I am referring to the Oscar statuette. I am away from televisions and am not checking the internet for results (I am tivoing it) and now present my predictions (read: preferences) for Oscar wins, noting that I haven't seen most of the movies and have an agenda. These categories, for the most part, are written in the order of the PDF ballot on Oscar.com

Leading Actor: although I loved Forrest Whitaker on ER until he shot his brains out, I have to give this one to Leonardo DiCaprio--BLOOD DIAMOND who continues to impress FORREST has an oscar, now let's give him an Emmy for guest star on ER.

Supporting Actor: Eddie Murphy -- DREAMGIRLS, you mean he can do semi-serious roles along with comedic? Really, he was amazing in this movie which was truly snubbed for best picture WRONG!

Leading Actress: Although I haven't seen it, everyone is raving about Helen Mirren who plays THE QUEEN in THE QUEEN. Long live THE QUEEN!

Supporting Access:And I am telling you: Jennifer Hudson -- DREAMGIRLS. Take that Simon Cowell! CORRECT! I told you. Some of the Idol winners may have record deals, but none have Oscar gold

Animated Feature: Tough one. Although Happy Feet impressed at the box office, I think a lot of it was because of the release of the Harry Potter Trailer, but still boffo. I really liked CARS WRONG, Should have bet on the other horse, um, penguin

Art Direction, Costume Design, Sound Mixing: DREAMGIRLS
ART: The Academy PANS my suggestion
COSTUME: Marie Antoinette won; let them eat their cake for now

Cinematography: Don't care, let's say... The Illusionists... Rats, I was thinking of PAN'S LABYRINTH... along with everything else because I really don't

Directing: LETTERS FROM IWO JIMA. I was at a screening of this at the WB Studios introduced by Stephen Spielberg. One of the finest movies I've ever seen and the directing must have been very difficult, and so this movie earns it. DEPARTED. Missed it again. Guess I should have ignored the THE.

Documentary Feature: President Gore (sic) will provide a very uncharismatic acceptance speech for AN INCONVENIENT TRUTH. Although many of these are popular with the Democrats (aka: voting Academy members), AIT is the one that has made the biggest cultural impact. CORRECT, and kudos to the Veep on his performance with Leo at the dais.

Documentary Short: The Blood of Yingzhou District? CORRECT, but was it really worth it?
Film Editing: Blood Diamond? Why didn't I even notice THE DEPARTED in many of these categories. I would have picked them as sweeps if I hadn't blown through the minor ones
Foreign Language Film: Since after "A Beautiful Life" I have taken stabs in the dark at this category: Water? Was wrong, don't care about this one either
Makeup: I can't stand the flagrant anti-semite, but he's gonna walk away with some Nazi gold... APOCALYPTO is going to get it or else Mel is going to ask the academy "You're Jewish, right?"... A blessing and a curse, Mel doesn't get it because the Jews in Hollywood have something against him...

Original Score: I'm assuming THE QUEEN had a good original score. What's with this BABEL?

Original Song. There is a 3/5 chance that something from Dreamgirls will win, so I am giving my vote to "Listen" from the DREAMGIRLS soundtrack INCONVENIENT TRUTH? You're kidding me!

BEST PICTURE: Borat and Dreamgirls got snubbed! Yet this makes my choice much easier. Letters from Iwo Jima was great, but I just noticed The Departed on my scorecard. What to choose... I just watched the Departed a few days ago for the first time. Iwo Jima and Departed are bloody brilliant and just plain bloody, but the star-studded cast of Departed puts it over the top. THE DEPARTED gets top honors this year. We DEPART with a win.

Short Film Animated: Don't care: Maestro? Was wrong, still don't care

Short Film Live Action:

West Bank Story is a musical comedy about David, an Israeli
soldier, and Fatima, a Palestinian fast food cashier - an unlikely couple who fall in love amidst the animosity of their families' dueling falafel stands in the West Bank.
Tensions mount when the Kosher King's new pastry machine juts onto
Hummus Hut property. The Palestinians ruin the machine and the Israelis
respond by building a wall between the two eating establishments.
The couple professes their love for each other, triggering a chain of events that
destroys both restaurants and forces all to find common ground in an effort to
rebuild, planting a seed of hope.

How could you NOT vote for that. WEST BANK STORY for the sheer Israeliness of the plot! CORRECT! Maybe there is hope for peace yet.

Sound Editing, Visual Effects: PIRATES II broke all the records. It needs Oscar gold from SOME category... ' SOUND: Well at least LETTERS won something VISUAL: CORRECT!

Sound Mixing: I'm giving this to DREAMGIRLS; More appropriate for this category for a musical CORRECTAMUNDO!

Screenplay--Adapted : I'm giving this to BORAT because how could you refuse him, he's so cute, let's expose our racist tendencies to this slav with the camera! Well, THE DEPARTED, I like. You like? How did I not notice this. I would have totally chosen it had I noticed

Screenplay Original: Close it up with another golden-boy for LETTERS. Little Miss Sunshine. My Mom TiVoed this on HBO for me and I am yet to go to their house to watch it

That's the show

DVAR TORAH S2: Terumah ("What if God were one of us?")

This must be short as I am about to drive up to Palm Springs for Shabbos to celebrate my Sabbah's second Bar Mitzvah. However the topic I am going to start requires much more than the little time I am able to provide right now, so I will merely lay the groundwork for something I plan on, bli neder, continuing when I get back to LA on Sunday.

It is hard to glean expoundable gems from the torah portions for, say, three more months, until we get to Bamidbar (with some exceptions). But there is one line that is a red flag: Build me a Mikdash so that I may dwell in it". Whoa! We try to deanthropomorphize our transcendent God, but it is hard to remedy with a bombshell like this. Does God need a place to dwell (see book of Kings where God asks the very same question)? Or is it for us that God decides to have a centralized place for worship? So this is something you can discuss this Shabbos and I will get back to it when I get back.


Shabbat Shalom,
Matt

Mishenichnas Adar Marbin B'Simcha

מש מש מש מש מש מש מש מש משנכנס אדר

מש מש מש מש מש מש מש מש משנכנס אדר

משנכנס אדר מרבין בשמחה

משנכנס אדר מרבין בשמחה

MiShe MiShe MiShe MiShe, MiShe MiShe MiShe MiShe, Mishe Nichnas Adar
MiShe MiShe MiShe MiShe, MiShe MiShe MiShe MiShe, Mishe Nichnas Adar
Mishe Nichnas Adar Marbin B'Simcha!
Mishe Nichnas Adar Marbin B'Simcha!


When the When the When the When the, When the When the When the When the, When the is entered,
When the When the When the When the, When the When the When the When the, When the is entered,
When the month of Adar is entered, we increase in joy
When the month of Adar is entered, we increase in joy

Cuando Cuando Cuando Cuando Cuando Cuando Cuando Cuando Cuando entramos Adar
Cuando Cuando Cuando Cuando Cuando Cuando Cuando Cuando Cuando entramos Adar
Cuando entramos al mesa Adar, tenemos mas felicidad
Cuando entramos al mesa Adar, tenemos mas felicidad

Ven iz Ven iz Ven iz Ven iz, Ven iz Ven iz Ven iz Ven iz, Ven is gekumen
Ven iz Ven iz Ven iz Ven iz, Ven iz Ven iz Ven iz Ven iz, Ven is gekumen
Ven is gekumen di choydesh Adar, mer is di freylech
Ven is gekumen di choydesh Adar, mer is di freylech

All this completely ignoring grammatical constructs, just the way I like it...

Oh yeah, and 新年快乐!

DVAR TORAH S2: Mishpatim ("let's talk about sex, baby")

Okay kids, this one's PG-13. That's the disclaimer. If you're not ready for this, get your Torah-fix here for just this week.

This week's Torah Portion is Mishpatim, which literally means "judgements" or "laws". How appropriate for a portion chock full of them. What I love this Torah portion because, although it is full of mitzvot (sefer chinuch counts 53 of them, 8.6% of the 613 mitzvot can be found in this portion) there are so many fascinating things to talk about. Assuming I write one Dvar Torah on each of the mitzvot annually, I will be still writing these things at age 75. But by then the internet will have been replaced by telepathy. Anywho, Last year I talked about biomedical ethics and the obligation in our religion to have doctors that heal, that the Hippocratic Oath is inherent in Judaism. There are so many ways to incur the death penalty here. If you hit a man and he dies, you will surely die. If you hit your parents, you die. If you curse your parents, you die. If you put an empty container of OJ back into the damn fridge, you die. Understand?

Anyway, this relatively short dvar will focus on Exodus 21:10:

אִם־אַחֶרֶת יִֽקַּֽח־לוֹ שְׁאֵרָהּ כְּסוּתָהּ וְעֹֽנָתָהּ לֹא יִגְרָֽע

We don't need to deal with the content of the first half of the verse, rather the end "her food, her clothing, and her 'season' shall not be diminished". This verse, originally talking about a man who takes another wife owes these things to his wife. He must provide adequate food, clothing, and sex (which is the Rabbinic interpretation of the euphemism "season") to keep her satisfied. Without the ability and/or the motivation to provide these things, there is no possibility for the marriage to continue.

Tractate Ketubot, which some of you had studied in Advanced Talmud with me a few years ago, talks about these things guaranteed to women, particularly focusing on the last one. What is the frequency that one must give sex to one's wife? I don't have the tractate in front of me, but I remember that it depends on the profession. Someone who is a member of the "leisure class" must perform the deed DAILY (outside of the obvious week or so of Niddah and Levana) where such deeds are forbidden). Day laborers who tend to be tired have to do it twice a week. Us scholars are required to provide for our wives weekly, as do people with steady local jobs. This is where the legend of "Sex is a Double Mitzvah on Shabbat" came from, the fact that the one day off was Shabbat after the 6 day work-week and therefore this is when the scholars would come home and the workers weren't completely exhausted from work. Camel drivers have a month to get back home and sailors on the open sea, six months.

One cannot vow an open-ended vow to withhold sex from one's wife or else the Rabbis can attempt to nullify the marriage (not even requiring a get) and one must have permission from one's wife (non-coerced) to extend the deadlines.

I should note that it is not for procreation that we are commanded to do this but for our wives' enjoyment. Judaism is by no means a repressed religion. Remember: "Oneg karah leShabbat." Shabbat was made for enjoyment. So enjoy.

Shabbat Shalom.

Next season for Mishpatim divrei torah: shor she-naga, the ox that gores. (bli neder)

DVAR TORAH S2: Yitro ("Birth of Bureaucracy")

This is my first Dvar Torah in Season 2. A year ago, on this very parasha, I started writing what I at the time thought was going to be a one shot deal. Yet people really liked it and I found it therapeutic so I continued. Now I have to make the decision whether to continue, I am leaning toward "yes". And now a year later I have the added challenge of being original. Bli neder, I will try to be somewhat original, though I will not always read over my previous Divrei Torah. So hear launches Season 2, version 2.0, the sophomore year.

So let me start by focusing on the other section of the Torah portion. This portion has two major sections: that of Jethro (aka: Yitro/Yeter/Hobab/Reuel/Chever/Keni/Putiel) and his arrival, contributions, and departure, and that of the account of the Revelation, namely the Aseret HaDibrot. Last year I tackled the latter, this year I will tackle the former.

Jethro, the quintesential ger hatzedek and shaliach of the Jewish people, as well as Moses' father-in-law came at some point (disputed whether before or after the Ten Commandments) to deliver his daughter and grandsons as well as to have a heart-to-heart with his son-in-law. He has tried all religions and deities and, rejoicing in what God did for His people Israel, he found Judaism to be the only one that made sense and the God of Israel as the only God. He then sacrificed to God and shared his thanksgiving offerings with the people, a national celebration of his conversion. He then went home, midrashically he did it to be a missionary to the rest of the world, to proliferate the Name of God.

But before he left, Yitro, as all parents-in-law so often do, saw fit to leave some parting words of advice. He noticed that Moses was judging the people all day and all night, poskining law for the entire community and individuals. "This is not good the thing that you are doing", you can't concentrate power into only one person, even if you are Moses and if you're doing this for too long you're going to get tired and you will be lax in judgment. The latter resulted in the mitzvah that Jewish courts can only convene during daylight hours (one of the reasons that the Sanhedrin could have never convened to condemn Jesus). The former resulted in the creation of a court bureaucracy and hierarchy. There would be courts representing various populations to adjudicate regular law. The really big cases would go to the "Supreme Court", that being Moses and ultimately God, the smaller ones would consist of judges over 1000 people, 100 people, 10 people and other numbers.

God likes this idea and tells Moses to go ahead and find people to ordain as judges. What does it mean to be a leader? According to the criteria, a judicial candidate must be "valorous men who fear God (must have experience and a good track record), men of truth who hate bribes (must be trustworthy). Are there other qualities we look for in a leader. Though these criteria can obviously be applied to the modern judicial system, let's take leading a service as a modern example. A Shaliach Tzibur, as literally the representative of the community, has to know how to lead the service and read hebrew (preferably with a nice voice), they must be known as honest and upright people to be allowed to appeal to God on behalf of the community, and around High Holiday times having a little extra money doesn't hurt. Indeed wealth is considered a good quality for an ancient judge not because they're better than everyone else, and not only because they are less likely to take bribes, but that they know how to properly manage money. Is this an important quality for a leader?

These are not rhetorical questions I am asking. What qualities should we look for in a leader? Please comment.

Shabbat Shalom!

DVAR TORAH: Beshalach/Shabbat Shira/Tu Bishvat/Groundhogs Day/Tu Many Superlatives. (Three Heroines)

It's the first time since 1999 since the groundhogs, most notably Punxsutawney Phil predicted an early end to winter. Sorry New York, no snow. The Rabbis of the Talmud would likely refer to Groundhog's Day as a Minhag Shtoot. I will leave it to you to figure out what I mean.

This Torah Portion, Beshalach, marks the last parasha in the Dvar Torah cycle which I began last year with Yitro. One year and a Jewey Award (Okay, a Jewish & Israeli Blogs
People's Choice Award) later and I'm still going strong, I think.

Beshalach marks the Exodus from Egypt and the traversing of the Sea of Reeds by the Israelites and their collapse upon the chariots of Egypt. Within this portion is a devise of ultimate love and devotion: Shira, spontaneous song to God. Usually recited by ageless angels, today it was recited by the Children of Israel as this people who had known nothing but centuries of bondage, oppression, sorrow, and abandonment sang a new song unto God.

The angels wanted to sing the praises of God, but were forced silent as the Children of Israel crossed, and further silenced when the Egyptians were drowned ("You want to sing Hallel when my children, the Egyptians, are drowning?!) It is a time for Israel of leadership and initiative. Nachshon ben Aminadav is the first into the raging sea, only when the water reaches his nose does it split; when his soul almost leaves him (Paraphrasing Psalm 69, as the Tisha B'Av durge says, "Don't cast me off, don't leave me, because the waters have come to envelop my soul"). All of the Israelites then trudged in and marched through the sea, "the sea became walls to their right and their left", and when the sea came crashing together upon their oppressors, they sang unto God. However the men were upstaged by Miriam and the women with their song. Miriam the Prophetess, sister of Moses and Aaron, and the women, unlike the men, had actually believed in the salvation of God and had prepared their song in advance, preparing tambourines and timbrels. Whereas the guys sang a capela, the ladies had accompaniment. This is why the Talmud says that the women of Israel were the reason for the Exodus.

The Haftarah from the book of Judges tells of the heroics and song of other women. It is the story of the leader of the Jewish people Judge Deborah, her General Barak, and a righteous gentile named Yael of the Kenite people. Deborah, who holds the highest post of any woman in the Bible (and there are people who say women can't be rabbis or witnesses? She's a judge!) is engaged in war against Eglon the king of Moab (ED: Correction: Yavin, king of Canaan; damn you Wikipedia!!!) and his general Sisera. Sitting under her palm tree flanked by her general Barak, she organizes a strategic plan which routs the Moabite army. Meanwhile the actual salvation comes through the God-fearing wife of a Kenite friend of Eglon. When general Sisera realizes he has been defeated he hides in the tent of an ally's wife, giving her the instructions to guard the entrance and not to tell anyone he is there. Once he is asleep, Yael takes a tent peg and hammers it into the skull of Sisera, killing him. The war is over, 40 years of peace in the land is nigh. While 40 years might not seem that much in the grand scheme of things, modern Israel today hasn't gone 40 weeks without some sort of conflict. So Deborah sang a song of praise, to God and to Yael. This week we have two triumphant songs and three heroic women. Both the songs and the women will go down in history as harbingers of Israel's glory.

Also, scribal oddities: both songs are written in scrolls like sea waves/bricklayer patterns, both of which were previous realities for the Israelites (they had to lay bricks and they saw the crashing together of the waves)

Shabbat Shira Shalom, especially to anyone named Shira!

Chased by ducks

Nope, the title is not creative in any sense. Today I was chased by a flush of ducks ("flush" being a collective noun for the species). I don't know which species, but they were all black, with white bills, red eyes, yellow and black legs, and huge webbed blue-green feet. They look sort of similar to Black Scoters, but I'm not quite sure. Anyway on my 11.3 mile jog/powerwalk today (map shown below), I went around a number of ponds and lakes. At Lake Encino, as I was making a sharp turn on the pedestrian path. Suddenly a duck leaves the water and jumps up the 8 inches of concrete to right behind me. This reverse-Nachshon was followed by a couple hundred ducks. These things chased me maybe 1,000 feet. Then they found something more interesting to stalk. That's when I reached the largest goose (I'm not sure it was a goose, it may have been a roc) I have ever seen. Now this gi-normous white bird this started sizing me up, walking around me. It started quacking and soon I started walking away (I wanted to keep at least some pace to my jog) and sure enough the huge bird followed me into the parking lot.

It was a great jog today, as you can see on my mapmyrun jog. I am not so sure about the calories burned stuff, but I had one hell of a workout.



Ciao!

Eilat of trouble

This morning the serenity of the Israeli seaside resort city of Eilat was shattered when a homicide-bomber murdered three people. It was the first attack in Israel in 9 months and the first ever attack in the desert paradise city. A number of groups claim responsibility and it seems this is an attempt to delay the impending civil war among the Palestinian forces.

I hope the world realizes now who the aggressor is due to this unprovoked attack. I'm sure they still blind themselves to the truth by putting oil in their eyes. What would Jimmy Carter say about this unprovoked attack? I'm sure he'd blame the Zionists for this somehow. I know I take a lot of shots at the malaise-ridden president, but I am very curious if President Peanut will be able to defend the actions of another unprovoked suicide attack (I'm sure he'll try).

I don't think their sins will be forgiven this Ashura (compare to Yom Kippur)... It's ironic. The day in Islam celebrates Moses' rejoicing for the Israelites exodus from Egypt and yet there are a number of Muslims who do not even respect Muhammad's wishes of acknowledging the connection of the Jews to Israel and renouncing violence on this day.

I love this headline from Hot Air. I think it says it all about the ridiculousness of these suicide bombings:

Pali jihadi heroically liberates Zionist bakery in Eilat, killing three; Update: 100 jihadis caught from Sinai last year

I was in Israel for the previous two suicide bombings. Both were at the same falafel stand in Tel Aviv. Are there tactical installations in eating establishments? Perhaps a military base. Maybe that's where Israel hides her nukes! No. All these three attacks have in common that these places are where civilians were trying to buy some pita. This is not a war against some invading army, this is a war against regular men, women, and children. There is a technical term for this: genocide. The terrorists will not succeed.

It should be mentioned that Eilat at the southern tip of Israel has (at least until today) a relatively open and unfenced border with Egypt to the west and shares (or will share) an airport with Jordan to the east. The city is especially important to me as it is the sister-city of Los Angeles. Why do people wish to shatter the peace?

For the latest in news from Israel, check out my links to Israeli news sources.

DVAR TORAH: Bo (Yet another blow to Primogeniture)

Last week we glossed over the first nine plagues (well, in the D'var Torah; in the actual portion we did 1-7). Now for #10. Death of the Firstborn (well, not exclusively). First of all, at the 8th plague I noticed the civil disobedience that was building up. Pharoah's advisors ask, "How long is this guy going to be a snare to us? Let his people go serve their God for Egypt is lost". They are shortly going to willingly let Israel despoil their belongings (which they originally stole from the Israelites when they first enslaved them).


Alright, so this plague was introduced even before the first plague. Let us go back to Chapter 4 of Exodus (I quote the 1917 edition of the JPS as I have little time and therefore please excuse the archaic terminology):

21 And the LORD said unto Moses: 'When thou goest back into Egypt, see that thou do before Pharaoh all the wonders which I have put in thy hand; but I will harden his heart, and he will not let the people go. 22 And thou shalt say unto Pharaoh: Thus saith the LORD: Israel is My son, My first-born. 23 And I have said unto thee: Let My son go, that he may serve Me; and thou hast refused to let him go. Behold, I will slay thy son, thy first-born.'

Okay, but I find a disconnect between verses 22 and 23. I don't know if any commentators pick up on this but I have always seen verse 23, in the second person singular, as directed at Moses not Pharaoh. What happens immediately after is an angel trying to kill either Moses or his son and is only let go when Tziporrah gives him a bris. Why else would it need to say "and I have said to you"?

Why the plagues? The following may seem heretical but I want to place this in a historic context. It appears to me that many of these plagues are directed not only at Pharaoh and Egypt but at their gods. Judaism was not at this point monotheistic. The second commandment is that "You shall have no other gods before Me" not "You shall have no other gods". You could have other gods, but the Lord is the head of the pantheon, the supreme God. Numbers 21:14 mentions a missing book called "The Book of the Wars of the Lord". The Psalm for Tuesday mentions God standing in the court of El denouncing the other gods assembled. "Who is like you among the gods, Lord?". Where is that? It is the translation of Mi Chamocha. There is apparently celestial struggle and that the plagues are directed at destroying the gods of Egypt. As I mentioned last week, the plagues were introduced against the four elements, all deified in Egypt. The Nile was sacred because it brought life to the Two Lands, so God killed it, hence the blood. He killed all of the cattle on three occasions (I don't know how they had any left after Dever/Cattle death, but the ones of those who didn't fear God died in Barad/Hail and then the firstborn beasts died during Makat Bechorot/Death of the Firstborn.

What is the point of all this. This is God who cannot be attacked. To precursor the tenth plague God had the Israelites take one of Egypt's top deities, the lamb, and tie them to their houses, while the shocked Egyptians looked on. After four days, they slaughtered the lambs and smeared their blood on their doors. The Yiddish language has the most appropriate word for this: Chutzpah! Wow, the gumption and cojones of the Jews to schmear the lamb's blood on their doors and barbecue them right in front of their oppressors (possibly during the plague of darkness when the Egyptians couldn't move). This is the only plague that has an observance surrounding it. It, to this day, is the most observed Jewish custom. More than fasting on Yom Kippur, more than lighting Chanukkah candles, more than 98% of Jews have some sort of Passover Seder. This is such an important time of year that the mitzvah is given here to make Aviv (in our modern calendar, Nisan) the First of Months, something which lasted probably until the hiatus in the Jewish monarchy. The rabbis suggest that the Torah should have started here.

While death was all around them they were able to have a quiet meal. The family unit and the community are so important, to comfort one another in the face of death and to remain strong.

Though the Egyptian firstborns die, God has a special role for the Jewish firstborn. First they are the original Kohanim, the priests (later supplanted by Aaron and his descendants) but they always must be redeemed from this Holy task with which they are commanded. The first of all Kosher animals (as well as donkeys for some reason) must be redeemed as well.

Two of the four texts in the tefillin are found at the conclusion of this Torah portion. Two of the Four Sons' questions (from the Seder) are also found in this portion.

"It came to pass at midnight", but now the Israeloids (they are technically not -ites yet until they are in the atmosphere, right? are packed, their loins girded, and their matzah not leavening, and they will leave first thing in the morning.

Shabbat Shalom.

T'was not Blue Monday for me

Though yesterday was Blue Monday, it was pretty damn good for me.

-I jogged/walked 12 miles, burning 1600 calories (see previous post) and felt great throughout.
-I found out I lost 34 lbs in 6 weeks just by dieting and exercising, 18 lbs from fat, 10.2 in the past two weeks, 7.1 from fat.
-A really good class, which I made it back from my walk in perfect timing to change from my jogging clothes
-An eye-opening documentary about the Armenian Genocide was screened at VBS, Screamers (out Friday nationwide, I highly recommend it!) featuring metal band System of a Down. and attended by Shavo, the bassist for S.O.A.D. (see this article from the non-Jewish world)
I plan on treating the topic of the Armenian Genocide in a future entry
-Being on the Fox 11 news at said event in a crowd shot.
-My blog just won the 2006 Bronze Jewish and Israel Blogs Peoples Choice Award in the category of Best Overall Blog. I also would have won bronze in Best New Blog and Best Personal Blog but I had already won in the top category. w00t.

MapMyRun.com: Check it Out

Hello, Matt Rutta thinks that you should check out the workout he/she just plotted online: http://www.mapmyrun.com/route/united-states/ca/encino/222795123 Matt Rutta says, "My walk/jog today. Burned 1600+ calories, apparently." MapMyRun.com provides people of all athletic ability easy-to-use, comprehensive web-based tools to get healthy and train more effectively as an individual or group. These fun, free, interactive tools include: Online graphical pedometer / route mapper in 2D and 3D (GoogleEarth!) Online elevation tool Workout calculators enabling users to calculate key statistics such as pace, calories burned, etc. Collaborate / Sharing features that allows users to share their workouts with friends and family Cobranding / Syndication tools to enable organizations like Team in Training to share this site with it's users (Learn More) Don't believe us? Read our recent press piece from the Greenville News: http://www.greenvilleonline.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=2006611140354 Come visit us soon! Cheers, The MapMyRun.com Team

Note: Your email address has not been saved in our system so you are not opted into any email lists, or such.
It has been used for this one time 'Tell-A-Friend' email. Click here to read our extensive privacy policy...

Razored heads and RAZR phones

Three skinheads in a pickup truck just tried to sell me a Razr phone for $10 as I was jogging to Whole Foods to shop for Shabbos. Freaky. Thank God I wasn't talking on my cell in Hebrew or Yiddish at the time as I commonly do. Actually, they may have mistaken the latter for German and maybe they would have sold it to me for $5. That was bizarre.

Shabbos beckons, time to shower.

DVAR TORAH: Va'era: ("I send my scourge, I send my sword/Let My People Go/Thus saith the Lord")

Ah, the plagues! Such an exciting part of the Torah saga! I studied the plagues in depth for about a month-and-a-half last year at Pardes. We studied the Torat Chayim, a compilation of various commentaries and written on the Torah, and this long stretch of our focus was spent on the plagues. I wish I still had my notes from last year, but, alas, all of the old computer content is in limbo.

Let's see what I remember (or if I remember). Let's recall the 10 drops of wine we spill at Sedernakht (16 if you're including Datza"ch Ada"sh Bacha"b and blood, fire, and pillars of smoke, and don't get me started on 40, 50, 200, 250, though we did study this too):
1. Dam - Blood____2. Tzfardea - Frogs__3. Kinim - lice
4. Arov - Wild Beasts/flies_5. Dever - Cattle Death_6. Sh'chin - boils
7. Barad - Hail_8. Arbeh - Locusts_9. Choshech - Darkness
10. Makat Bechorot - Death of the Firstborn

According to various commentaries, the plagues have an organization, such as groups of 3. 1-3 are a group, 4-6 are a group, 7-9 are a group, differentiated by the language and the type of attack. Then there are series of the first (1,4,7), second (2,5,8), and third (3,6,9) plagues in each of these groups share similar delivery and venue. It is this latter organization I would like to discuss. The first group, Blood, Wild beasts (or flies), and Hail, involve Moses going to Pharaoh who is at the Nile. Moses is to go early in the morning when Pharaoh is bathing (or going to the bathroom, interesting commentary in the Talmud, Moed Katan 18a). God does not want to go there because of the idolatry in the water so he says "lech" "go to pharaoh". It is Aaron for the most part that executes these plagues because Moses cannot strike against the waters which saved his life. Second series, Frogs, Cattle Death, and Locusts, the warnings take place at the palace, this time "bo el paro" "come to pharaoh". God is present in the palace and asks Moses to join him. The third series, lice, boils, and darkness, are the wildcard and occur without warning following immediately after the second series.

The lengths of the plagues are remarkable as are their effects on the Jews. Some of the plagues did affect the Jews. Also the response of Pharaoh's magicians only occurs during the first group. They replicate the first two plagues (actually making it worse) but are unable to replicate the third, after which they say "it is the finger of God", after which we don't hear about them again until they are covered in boils. There are times when pharaoh hardens his own heart and then God is the one to harden it. Pharaoh freaks during a number of the plagues and offers concessions to the Israelites slightly more at each of these plagues (he haggles, 'cause Pharaoh don't pay retail!), these being the plagues in which Pharaoh fears a repeat of Sodom & Gomorrah or mortil peril. While not having water for 7 days might kill you, it might not. Frogs multiplying like crazy? Thats some scary **** plus the magicians couldn't get rid of them. Lice are annoying but not fatal (there wasn't lyme disease back then?). Wild beasts: those'll gore you to death: let the slaves go. Dead cows, they were vegetarians. Boils, ouch, but even without lotion they won't kill you. Fiery icy hail = hellfire and brimstone; Pharaoh feared a repeat of Sodom & Gomorrah. Locusts cause famine, seeing as there was no meat left, they would starve to death, must call Moses in for a pow-wow. Darkness, worst that can happen is you'll stub your toe. That's assuming you can move, which they could not. If you are stuck in place you can't walk off many cliffs.

The plagues call to order all of the elements. To start the plagues, WATER is struck to begin 1 and 2. The EARTH is struck to summon the lice, God Himself initiates numbers 4 & 5, Moses and Aaron reach into the FIRE of a furnace to pull out soot to throw into the AIR (Moses miraculously having two handfuls of soot in each hand) to start boils, Moses waves his staff in the AIR to start hail, FIRE and WATER working in tandem going from AIR to EARTH (all together in that one), as well as AIR for the locusts and darkness.

There are some fun features to each of the plagues that I would love to go into but this is getting way too long. Perhaps there is something on Wikipedia, but I suggest you study this fascinating topic from a Torat Chayim, a real treat.

The question you are probably asking is "but what about the Tenth Plague?" That, my friends, is for next week.

Shabbat Shalom!

PS: This Torah portion has ADD. Show me why. Hint: It has nothing to do with the plagues.

DVAR TORAH: Shemot (The Prince and the King... and the Heschel)

This weekend we read (past tense reading of the word "read") Parashat Shemot (or Parshas Sh'mos if you so choose), the first portion of the Second Book of the Torah, also of the same name. In it we learn of a world of constraint (Mitzrayim) where people are enslaved just because they are seen as different, as inferior, as dangerous! In the midst of this is born a boy, his life in constant mortal peril who climbs the eschalons of power and tests the newfound waters of civil disobedience, quotes God who demands the liberation of His people. (The boy is Moses, by the way, if you didn't know)

How appropriate that we also celebrate the birth and life of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. this weekend. He was born into a world where he and his people, though released from enslavement on paper a century before were nonetheless subjugated and enslaved in the United States through inequality and segregation. He quoted God and Prophet, Moses, he idolized, for his resoluteness and not backing down when threatened by :The Man" in Egypt.

The Jews and the African-Americans have a common experience. We were both slaves in the Land of Egypt, though even after we were freed, we still faced the tribulations second-class citizenry -- at the times we were actually considered citizens. It is for this reason, perhaps, not only as Jews, but as decent human beings have taken up the call of civil rights. Rabbi Abraham Joshua Heschel, who, had he not died at the young age of 65 would have celebrated his 100th birthday this past week, marched with Dr. King from Selma to Montgomery.

(Picture: King: Fourth from right Heschel: second from right)

Why then have the relationships between African Americans and Jews so deteriorated in Los Angeles? I posed this question last week, among others, to the retired Pastor of the First AME Methodist Church of Los Angeles, Rev. Cecil L. "Chip" Murray, who answered that the Jews have moved away from the urban centers, away from the innercity, and have held open the doors in the suburbs for the African-American community, which has not yet responded. Though we may acquire greatness (this is me talking now), we must remember one of the key messages repeated again and again and again, always "remember you were slaves in the land of Egypt". Be humble but be strong and resolute. Like The Prince of Egypt and the Doctor King, you too can change the world.

DVAR TORAH: Vayechi (it's a Greek Tragedy when everybody dies)

This is going to be yet another short one because I am raring to go on a jog and I want to go before it gets too hot. This past week's parasha, Vayechi, is the final one of Genesis. It is the parasha where we wipe the slate clean of the remaining patriarchs, Jacobs and all of his sons die at the end of the parasha in order to perpetuate the next main character of the Torah who will remain its main human for the remaining four books, Moses.

This portion, like many others that come before it discredits the policy of primogeniture. Jacob says, "Ephraim and Menashe are to me like Reuven and Shimon", and unless this is a chiastic structure (fascinating article at wikipedia!), Jacob just put the secondborn before the firstborn (just like he did in regards to his own brother, and just as Peretz did when he was coming out of the womb). Indeed, though Joseph tries to avert it, Jacob gives Ephrayim the stronger hand and stronger blessing, crossing right hand over left (so much for it not being a chiastic structure, he makes his hands looking, in fact, like a greek chi (X)). From this exchange we gain two important blessings for children: "Yesimcha Elokim K'Efraim U'kiM'nashe", confered by parents upon their sons at the sabbath table, and "HaMalach HaGoel Oti" (not only used during the penultimate aliyah of the Torah on Simchat Torah when we call up all the children, but also makes a handy-dandy seudah shlishit melody and is nice to hum when you say the Sh"mata, my contraction of Shema al HaMita when you are going to bed). What does Menashe get, by the way? His name was given to one of the, if not the, worst king of Judah. The name was also placed upon the grandfather of an idol-worshipper, replacing probably the name of Moses, because little old Menashe can take more punishment...

There are so many pearls in this final parasha of Bereishit. Jacob is about to reveal escatological events but then blanks and begins his blessing of Reuven. When Jacob dies, Joseph mummifies him (kind of cool, I guess). When the brothers think Joseph will finally get his revenge after their father dies, he says that it wasn't them but God that orchestrated the events that led him down to Egypt. So much for Caesar Trajan (yemach shemo!) using that against us (see Eleh Ezkera if you get bored on Yom Kippur, and perhaps As A Driven Leaf). And Joseph dies, he gets embalmed, made into a mummy, and then is he buried? Yeah, at the bottom of the Nile under a heavy gold plate because pharaoh didn't want the Jews to leave hundreds of years later when they had to fulfill their promise to bring back the bones of Joseph to Canaan. Ah Midrash...

Remember the password: "Pakod Yifkod". It will be important later.

Speaking of the bones of Joseph, you should read this article. It makes me sick... After 4000 years they destroy it now...

DVAR TORAH: Miketz AND Vayi...gash?

Actually, I'm not sure because I am rapid-firing this one off this week. This is a twofer because I didn't exactly have time last friday. I am once again cutting it close to the Shabbos clock. Services in 8 minutes...

Last week ended on a most excellent cliff-hanger. Benjamin is framed for grand larceny (grand in the eyes of Egyptian law anyway) and is arrested. The scene begins with a confrontation between Joseph and Judah, a scene which I had, two years ago, given a D'var Torah for at Koach during Reading Week of Finals. I will replace this with that D'var Torah if I find it, but the gist is that midrash accords that Joseph and Judah were trying to intimidate each other to the extent that they were tearing down both Joseph's palace and the firmament of the Heavens. Judah was causing himself to bleed out his eyes, ears, mouth, and nose and Joseph was destroying the columns with his bare hands. I compared this to the attitude I witnessed and experienced in Butler. I think that might have been me last week.

Anyway, once I find the original, which is probably only stored on my old not-working computer, I will try to post it. Until then, Shabbat Shalom and don't stress yourself out as much as Joseph and Judah.

Beating the odds

I have never been a fan of gambling. I have always shunned putting money on the line. Chanukkah has been the exception because of a certain psak to gamble then. I would look it up, but am currently in Las Vegas with my family and don't have unfettered internet access. Utilizing the Torah portion for Hanukkah in Parashat Naso, the dedication of the Tabernacle was 12 days, not 8. Using this twisted logic, it is the 11th night of Hanukkah (I know Chanukat HaMishkan happened in Adar/Nisan...) I did therefore gamble a little. I lost on the slot machines for the most part but won in betting on football.

$20 on NFL Jets +2.5 over Dolphins WON! + 18.20
lost $5.55 on slot machines over the past couple of days - 5.55
I have won from Vegas $12.65

Not only that, but on a free pull I won two tickets to the Fab Four play. I think I'll quit while I'm ahead. As you can see, I don't gamble too much. I keep track of everything I spend. This is as effective as writing down everything I eat, which I do as part of my diet. I have my exploits notated which I plan on posting (or updating this post) later. For now, I need to leave it at this due to limited internet access.

I'm like King Midas, in both the senses of the Greek legend and the automaker, everything I touch, I get shocked. Damn dry air...

More when I leave. Probably a blackberry post during the drive back on Friday morning or something...

Vegas Navidad

Let's see if this works on a blackberry through e-mail...

I finally finished my Rabbinical School applications so I am going
with the mishpocha to Nevada and Arizona for the week. That's it for
now...

DVAR TORAH: [C]han[n]uk[k/q]a[h]

Weight loss this week: 4 lbs of fat, 0 lbs of lean muscle.
Total weight loss (over 2 weeks): 14 lbs, 4 lbs of fat, 10 lbs of lean muscle

I realized that I neglected to write a Dvar Torah this past week, and as there is both a regular torah portion (Vayeshev) and Hanukkah, there isn't enough time for both. So if you want a Dvar Torah on Vayeshev, go see the first 15 minutes of Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat.

Let's move on to Chanuka.

I have been asked twice in the past week about the miracle of Chanuqah, from both sides of the spectrum. Last week at a lunch-and-learn at the UJ and yesterday by Catholic business associates of my father. The associates asked why the Menora was so important. The Temple needed light so that it could function. It took, in the ancient world around a week to prepare olives to become oil. It was vital that there be pure oil as everything in the Temple had to be pure. There was no way of sacrificing quality for quantity.

At the UJ lunch-and-learn, the question was raised as to what was the miracle of Hanukkah. I said it was not in the oil lasting eight days but that there was discovered a pure sealed cruse of oil in the first place. I found that something pure and intact in the defiled Temple is allegorical of a person who remains pure and innocent in a place of ill-repute. The Maccabees were not Hellenized, though they were surrounded Grecophiles. They never gave up. Could someone growing up in Nazi Germany or in Gaza City avoid being swept up in the depraved death cultures? Would it be possible to be immune to the brainwashing in schools and in places of worship? The professor really liked this idea.

Sorry I'm so scattered. I've been working on essays for a really long time.

If you haven't noticed, there are many ways to spell [C]han[n]uk[k/q]a[h], this just in standard US Sephardi pronounciation (ie: not chanuke, etc). Can you count how many possibilities there are?

It's gonna be the best Chrismahanukwanzakah ever!

10 lbs in 6 days

My diet is going absolutely great in terms of weight loss. On my nutritionist's scale, I have lost 10 pounds in the first six days. The negative part is that it is all lean muscle that I have lost. Fat weight hasn't gone down, but actually up 0.2 lbs. I just need to drink more water. I'm feeling good and doing a lot of every day exercising, such as walking (many miles and two towns away) home from the doctor's office, running up and down many stairs, and playing an obsessive amount of DDR (see the article for details on weight loss).

So my main foci right now are getting into Rabbinical School and losing weight. A third focus would be to find a nice Jewish girl, but let's take this one step at a time here.

A tribute to Reb Shlomo Carlebach

I was a featured singer this week at a tribute service to the life and music of Shlomo Carlebach held at VBS, singing a duet of L'man Achai and singing the Moshe V'Aharon/Romemu of Kabbalat Shabbat. It appears that as a result of the smashing success of the Farbrengen, as they were calling it, I will be able to go ahead with an actual Carlebach Kabbalat Shabbat. Now some of my friends may scoff at this as a simple task. After all, we do Carlebach all the time in New York and Jerusalem. However, most places of worship, in all religions, have difficulty with change. The Lecha Dodi melody we use at Kabbalat Shabbat has remained constant for more Shabbatot than I have been alive. However, Reb Shlomo's music struck a chord (pun intended) with the congregations (as well as a plethora of guests) and interest is high for something else Carlebach.

Carlebach frequented my synagogue way back when and sang on a number of occasions with my cantor. Carlebach's greatest contribution is that he brought an entire generation (and future generations) of Jews back to Judaism, not a simple task in the '60s nor today. He definitely made my life better. There is nothing like a good Carlebach service. Well, maybe a nice chulent, but every single ingredient in that is anathema to my new diet. D'oh!

I did a lot of singing this weekend, joining with the Cantor on Saturday morning. I think I may have inadvertently become a tenor. Uh oh.


Back to essays...

Thoreau had the right idea

I should never discount the therapeutic and logorrheic value of a park. I got immense amounts of work done on my Rabbinical School essays at Holmby Park. I took my dog on a walk (though he'd like to think that he's taking me on the walk). After a while I sat on a bench, extended his leash, and took out about 18 pages out of my pocket. As Tuggy tried to chase squirrels up a tree, I made a lot of progress.

Good Shabbos.

DVAR TORAH: Vayishlach (Count Esau the Impaler)

Dots! Once again normal Dvar Torah is superseded by scribal oddities. When Jacob and Esau are reunited. Though he expected his brother to kill him, Esau hugged and kissed him. Kissed him, eh? The Torah says, וַיְנַשֶּׁק־לוֹ (vaynashek lo), which means "and he kissed him", but there is one of those rare dots above the word written in the Torah scroll. The Rabbis take this to mean that there is more than meets the eye about the word. וינשק־לו, with only a single letter changed becomes וינשך־לו, (vaynashekh lo) "and he bit him". Ergo, Esau's a vampire.

Another pointless read as I have no time. Shabbat Shalom.

PS: Whoa, my cousin's watching "Boy Meets World" and I just noticed producer Michael Jacobs, a member of my shul, having a cameo where he's davening, with kippa, tallis, and what appears to be an Artscroll in a NICU-ward of a hospital.

Homosexual Ordination and Marriage

A watershed day in the history of Judaism, the Conservative Movement's Law Committee just passed three of five papers on the subject of homosexual ordination and marriages. Two of the papers upheld the ban on both and the third paper, by Rabbi Elliot Dorff, allows limited ordination and marriage of homosexuals provided they never engage in anal sex and remain monogamous. The two papers that would have uprooted the law against homosexual relations were defeated. Multiple decisions are not binding as each community can decide which of the accepted opinions to adopt for their community.

Note that these papers are slightly different than the three discussed last time around (see my posts from, I think, March of this year). Think of these results as the passing two of the rightist opinion (and one of them is Rabbi Roth's) and the middle opinion, which remains largely unchanged.

I have not seen any of the papers yet but they should be published soon, with votes recorded as passed opinions must become a matter of public record. The two leftist papers, however, will probably never be published publicly.

Matt

Here is an article from the AP:

Conservative scholars ease gay rabbi ban
Decision upends thousands of years of precedent while stopping short of fully accepting gay clergy

Associated Press Published: 12.06.06, 22:34

Conservative Jewish scholars eased their ban Wednesday on ordaining gays, upending thousands of years of precedent while stopping short of fully accepting gay clergy.

The Committee on Jewish Law and Standards, which interprets religious law for the movement, adopted three starkly conflicting policies that nonetheless gave gays the chance to serve as clergy.

One upholds the prohibition against gay rabbis. Another, billed as a compromise, permits gay ordination while continuing to ban male sodomy. The third upholds the ban on gay sexual relationships in Jewish law and mentions the option for gays to undergo therapy aimed at changing their sexual orientation.

That leaves seminaries and synagogues to decide on their own which approach to follow.

It will also test what Conservative Jewish leaders call their "big tent," allowing diverse practices by the movement's more than 1,000 rabbis and 750 North American synagogues.

The 25-member panel made its decision in a two-day closed meeting in an Upper East Side synagogue. Students from a gay advocacy group at the Jewish Theological Seminary, the flagship school of Conservative Judaism, stood vigil nearby while the results were announced.

Conservative leaders are struggling to hold the shrinking middle ground of American Judaism, losing members to both the liberal Reform and the traditional Orthodox branches.

Reform Jews, as well as the smaller Reconstructionist branch, allow gays to become rabbis; the Orthodox bar gays and women from ordination.

The last major Law Committee vote on gay relationships came in 1992, when the panel voted 19-3, with one abstention, that Jewish law barred openly gay students from seminaries and prohibited the more than 1,000 rabbis in the movement from officiating at gay union ceremonies.

Canadian congregations to consider idea

The debate focuses on Leviticus 18:22, which states, "Do not lie with a male as one lies with a woman," echoing the fight in mainline Protestant groups about the Bible and sexuality.

It's unclear whether any congregations in the United Synagogue of Conservative Judaism, the synagogue arm of the movement, will break away over the gay issue.

A handful of Canadian congregations, which tend to be more traditional than their US counterparts, have said they would consider the idea. However, leaders believe it's more likely that individuals who object to the change will leave to worship in Orthodox synagogues.

Arnold Eisen, incoming chancellor of the Jewish Theological Seminary, personally supports ordaining gays. But he said in a Nov. 22 e-mail to the seminary community that faculty will vote on how the school should respond to the committee's decison.

Rabbi Elliot Dorff, vice chairman of the panel and a supporter of gay ordination, is rector of The Ziegler School of Rabbinic Studies in Los Angeles, which also trains Conservative rabbis. The school was expected to admit gays now that the committee allows it.

Another one, from the Jewish Forward:

Breaking: Conservative Panel Votes To Permit Gay Rabbis
Four Committee Members Resign To Protest Decision
Rebecca Spence | Wed. Dec 06, 2006

In a historic vote, leaders of Conservative Judaism on Wednesday approved a rabbinic opinion allowing ordination of gay and lesbian rabbis and sanctioning same-sex unions.

The Committee on Jewish Law and Standards — the 25-member lawmaking body of the Conservative movement — opted to follow the rabbinic tradition of approving separate, mutually contradictory opinions, each of which is now sanctioned as normative Conservative practice. Of the three papers approved, the most permissive, authored by Rabbi Elliott Dorff, opens the door for gay rabbis and same-sex unions, but retains certain biblical bans on homosexual activity. Also vetted were two opinions that uphold the ban on ordaining gay rabbis, one submitted by Rabbi Joel Roth, and another, more extreme opinion submitted by Rabbi Leonard Levy.

Four of the most conservative members resigned the committee in protest: Roth, Levy, Mayer Rabinowitz and Joseph Prouser.

While the decision of the law committee marks a major turning point, it is now up to the individual Conservative seminaries and congregations to decide how to implement the ruling.

And at the movement’s two seminaries, situated on opposite coasts, the approaches are markedly different. The University of Judaism in Los Angeles has long maintained that it will immediately begin admitting gay and lesbian students as soon as the law committee passes a policy that sanctions gay ordination. But at the Jewish Theological Seminary — the movement’s flagship seminary in New York — the law committee’s decision will have to be weighed by the faculty, who plan to deliberate whether or not to begin accepting gay and lesbian students who want to become rabbis.

Judith Hauptman, a professor of Talmud and rabbinic culture at JTS and a prominent supporter of gay ordination, cautioned that the faculty there would not necessarily lean in favor of accepting gays and lesbians. “We can go either way on it,” said Hauptman. “We’re not making a decision about Jewish law, we’re making a decision about the school.”

Hauptman also said that many members of the faculty had not publicly disclosed their views on gay ordination, making it anyone’s guess what the final outcome would be. As for her own views, Hauptman expressed unflagging support for accepting gay students. “As soon as it is possible to ordain gay rabbis,” she said, “it becomes morally imperative on us to accept gay candidates for ordination.”

This week’s decision marks the final chapter in a divisive debate that has roiled the Conservative movement since 1992, when the law committee first took up the question of gays and lesbians becoming rabbis. That debate resulted in the adoption of an opinion that effectively banned gay ordination and unions. The committee’s current consideration of the issue began with the submission of nine papers in the spring of 2005, which were ultimately combined into four separate papers.

The wide gulf between the stances of JTS and of U.J. can be explained in part by the positions of the institutions’ faculty and leadership. The dean of the Ziegler School of Rabbinic Studies at U.J., Rabbi Bradley Shavit Artson, authored the1992 paper advocating gay ordination and unions, which was defeated at the time. That rabbinic opinion, known as a teshuvah, took the most liberal position in that it also lifted the ban on homosexual anal sex.

Rabbi Joel Roth, a professor of Talmud and Jewish law at JTS, wrote the opinion paper opposing gay ordination that gained approval some 15 years ago. In addition, the former chancellor of JTS, Rabbi Ismar Schorsch, has long argued that sanctioning gay ordination and unions would fracture the movement, with those who opposed it joining the ranks of the Modern Orthodox and those who supported it ultimately converging with Reform Judaism, America’s largest stream.

The appointment earlier this year of Arnold Eisen, a proponent of gay ordination, as the new chancellor of JTS signaled to many that the movement was now on track to open its doors to gay and lesbian clergy. Eisen, who is not a rabbi, is widely expected to turn to the pews in order to bolster support for the movement’s retooled approach to homosexuality.

At Wednesday’s vote, held at Manhattan’s Park Avenue Synagogue, five teshuvot were on the table, covering a diverse spectrum of opinion. The teshuvot in favor of upholding the ban on gay ordination and same-sex unions included an expanded version of Roth’s 1992 paper, as well as one written by Rabbi Leonard Levy, making the case that homosexuality is an illness that can be cured.

Rabbi Elliott Dorff, the rector of U.J., authored the paper that sanctions same-sex unions and allows for gay ordination, but falls short of deeming intercourse between men to be compatible with halacha, or Jewish law. An opinion submitted by Rabbi Gordon Tucker of Temple Israel Center in White Plains, N.Y., which advocated full equality of gays and lesbians in Conservative Judaism, with no restrictions on sexual behaviors, failed to pass after being turned into a takanah, an amendment to Jewish law rather than an interpretation. In an interview at his Los Angeles office, Dorff framed the debate in generational terms. He contended that most Conservative Jews on the younger side of the spectrum would support the decision to allow gay and lesbian rabbis, while older people who grew up in a society far less accustomed to people openly expressing their homosexuality might be opposed to the change. Dorff also noted that of the 25 members of the law committee, only two are under the age of 40.

In recent days student groups advocating a change in policy ramped up their activism in advance of the vote. Last week, U.J.’s pro-gay ordination group, Dror Yikra (Hebrew for “call to freedom”), sent each member of the law committee a copy of a letter in support of gay ordination that was signed by three-quarters of the student body.

“As future rabbis, we feel bound by the tenets of halakhah and moved by the ethical challenges posed by our new scientific knowledge and modern understandings of sexual orientation,” the letter stated. “We believe that there is a halakhically acceptable way for our movement to ordain gays and lesbians and for our rabbis to consecrate their love through Jewish commitment ceremonies.”

The group’s co-founder, Rachel Kobrin, a fifth-year rabbinical student, said that her decision to attend U.J. stemmed from its more liberal position on homosexuality. “I came here and not JTS because of this issue,” said Kobrin, 32. “Because I knew that Rabbi Artson was a serious advocate for change.” Indeed, according to Dorff, Artson accepted the job as dean of the rabbinic school on the condition that U.J. would begin accepting gay and lesbian students if and when the law committee ruled in favor of an inclusive policy.

While the majority of the student body at U.J. favors gay ordination, a quiet minority stands in opposition. One student who chose not to sign the letter, Ben Goldstein, a second-year rabbinical student from Rochester, N.Y., said that while he was conflicted in his views on the subject, he did not attach his name to the petition because he did not think that both sides had been given a fair hearing at U.J. Goldstein said that Dorff’s view had been fully parsed, but that Roth’s opinion upholding the ban had gotten short shrift.

“There are other people who feel the same way I do, but they won’t tell you,” he said, citing an atmosphere in which it was frowned upon to oppose gay ordination.

Meanwhile, at JTS, the student organization that advocates full inclusion of gays and lesbians, Keshet, hosted seminars on homosexuality in Judaism while the law committee deliberated. Students wearing rainbow ribbons and buttons proclaiming “ordination regardless of orientation,” participated in educational sessions on such diverse topics as the history of lobbying in the process of deciding Jewish law as well as gay interpretations of the classic Yiddish play, “The Dybbuk.”

The law committee’s decision to allow gays and lesbians to be ordained as rabbis and to sanction same-sex unions comes as other mainstream religions are grappling with similar internecine debates. In recent weeks a southern California diocese of the Episcopal Church (U.S.A.) moved to distance itself from the church over its ordination of gays and women, when it voted to identify as a member of the worldwide Anglican Communion, rather than a member of the American arm. That vote could portend a complete break from the church, which recently elected its first female bishop.

[H]azkarot for a non-Jew?

My uncle's fiance's father passed away today and I was wondering if anyone knew the policy for "making azkarot/hazkarot" (I've seen and heard it both ways and both technically work in Hebrew) for a non-Jew. I assume you don't do the thirty day thing like you would for a Jew. My other uncle's shloshim for his mother ends on tuesday and he will begin to add her name to the El Moley Rachamim list forthwith. But when the longtime head of maintainance passed away a few months ago, the Rabbi offered his name at the first market day after his passing. So is this halachic policy or is this something my shul just cooked up? Anyone have any idea?

L'havdil, can one make a Mi Shebeyrach for oneself? Can one ask another present to make it for one? I think I have a legitimate right to a prayer for healing. The back is not getting better. I even declined to lead davening this morning. I never turn the Sha"tz position down (my voice was also gone; I did end up leading maariv still)! Many hours of massages, 100 degree outdoor jacuzzi jets (hooray for a Los Angeles December), and hot showers did nothing except cause a desensitizing tickle. Oh well, just have to keep eating right and waiting until I can exercise again. No, I'm not joking... Today has been a complete waste of a day without the ability to take the focus off my back and onto my numerous Rabbinical School application essays.

I will need to seriously consider taking a sick day tomorrow, I probably won't as you've seen in my previous post, but the injury is very much affecting my concentration, and though I always play through the pain, I wouldn't be teaching at 100%. Perhaps at my doctor's appointment on Tuesday, he will straighten me out (ha, get it, straighten out, bad back, chiropractor joke! All that I'm not even on painkillers)

Layla tov.

Matt is back (-pain prone)

Gregor Samsa awoke one morning to find himself transformed into a cockroach. Matt Rutta awoke one shabbat morning (okay this morning) to find himself unable to get out of bed without suffering large amounts of back pain. I assume the source of the pain is due to the number of really tough passes I went for playing football this past week, perhaps in conjunction with my increased physical activity on account of getting a new iPod. It also probably does not help that I'm carrying around this excess weight (hey, I'm trying to lose it... I wish I was losing weight, not, say, sweatshirts and siddurim) I however couldn't get out of bed without being in sheer pain. If anyone knows me, I always play through pain. I have a torture-tolerance level higher than most in terms of being obstinately present at everything I need to be at to my own deficit. I won the attendance award at my high school graduation. I am like a combination Hermione Granger (in terms of dedication) and Neville Longbottom (in terms of horrendous luck). The advil I took today did absolutely nothing and I might have to take Vicodin or a more liver-friendly alternative to help me on the road to recovery.

It's difficult to balance Shabbat observance with comfort. I didn't want to use the heating pads on shabbat. When I had a fever of 103.7 a couple of years ago with my URI, I WAS in fact checking my temperature constantly, even on shabbat, due to obvious pikuach nefesh necessities (If it reached 104, I would have called CAVA). But I don't think back-pain qualifies for breaking or bending the rules of shabbat. Plus, I didn't know what to do when I have back pain, so I put some pillows directly under my lower back where it hurts. Oops; not a good idea...

I did, by the way, end up going to teach my class and take my students to services, which is just as well as my co- was out sick. My biggest concern when I was Gabbai of Koach, Co-Chair of Koach, or a Seudah Shlishit Coordinator (or just leading services) is how to tell people I wouldn't be able to make it due to debilitating sickness. More often than not, I still went. When I had gastroenteritis a few years ago and unable to eat solid food without, well see this entry from my deadjournal about it. I still ended up leading Carlebach service the next day even though I couldn't even eat solid food. I'm a fighter. I'll end this now so I can have the blissful sleep before I realize that I am still in intense pain.

Refuah Shleyma Umheyra: me.

That brings my almost-being-run-over-by-a-celebrity count to two

Well, it was pretty close from my vantage point anyway when the Congressman pulled out of the synagogue parking lot early this afternoon. I was also almost run over by Jerry Seinfeld 10 years ago in the CBS studio lot. Actually, I'm sure I have been almost run over by other celebrities during one of my escapades.

Anyway, it's been a while since my last real update. Actually, since shabbos is coming soon, this won't be that long either. Essays are consuming me, but I am excited to report that I got a new iPod, a video one, replacing my ill-fated iPod mini, which means that I can go on extended jogs again. In the iAge, I am unable to survive without something to distract me when exercising. It's the same reason that I need to be watching TV when jogging on the treadmill. There is a ying to every yang and nowadays I would lack the motivation to get in shape without music or podcasts to keep me going.

Speaking of boredom, I really miss everyone. Hope to see everyone relatively soon. Perhaps I will continue this tomorrow night or sunday because Shabbat is a'coming!

Shabbat Shalom.

DVAR TORAH: Vayetze (So dark the con of man)

Jacob has encountered his opposite in Esau, yes. Esau is a hunter, Jacob is a simple man who studies in his tent. Esau uses base instinct, Jacob uses his intellect, both to their radical extents. Jacob is a trickster, Esau is an idiot. It's a classic game of brains over brawn, the pen is mightier than the sword, and so forth. Jacob will always outsmart his dimwitted brother.

However, Jacob finds his foil in his Aramean uncle, Laban. Laban is a sort of Bizarro-Jacob. Laban is able to con Jacob, and as my synagogue's ritual director says on this topic, "A trickster doesn't like to be tricked". We all know the story about how Laban succeeds in tricking Jacob into marrying Leah and having to work for him for 20 years (7 years for Leah, 7 for Rachel, and 6 to gain a livelihood). But Midrash records this all to divine plan and that Jacob gets his comeuppance. Jacob plays a little three-card monty with Laban which Laban thinks he can't lose. He makes a deal during these last 6 years that he will only keep the speckled sheep (a rarity), and the pure colored (white, brown, black) sheep will remain with Laban. Huge litters of speckled sheep were born that year. Laban didn't want to lose a single sheep to his nephew/son-in-law and so made a new deal with Jacob: Jacob gets any striped sheep. This time Laban made sure that no white sheep mated with a black sheep, thus making striping impossible. Yet many of the sheep ended up striped. Fine, next year sheep with ring designs in their fur, impossible in nature. Laban still won't take any chances and therefore only gives Jacob sheep of one gender. Somehow, all of the next generation of sheep are ringed, speckled, and striped. Jacob ends up with all of Laban's wealth.

Unless anyone can think of a better one, the moral of this story is don't mess with the Jews, they're a tricky people. This is to make sure people are paying attention. Come up with a better moral, please.

Shabbat Shalom